A Lady’s Choice Read online

  Elizabeth let out a furiously frustrated groan. Lydia was most likely glorying in a very clever game, and enjoying the thought that her sisters would be overcome with jealousy at the grand adventure she was having. No doubt Kitty would be suitably jealous, but all Elizabeth could think of was the scandal that now say upon their family.

  To think that all and sundry would know the details of Lydia’s flight from Brighton, and that not only had she gone unchaperoned but that her youngest sister’s passions were stronger than her virtue… the chance that such a stigma would be passed on to the rest of the unmarried Bennet daughters was almost too much to be borne.

  She read Jane’s letters once more, feeling furious tears prick at her eyelashes once more as her eyes found the words she dreaded… that it was not yet known if Lydia and Mr. Wickham were married. She slammed the letters down onto the rough table before her. She had to tell Mrs. Gardiner, and she must go back to Longbourn at once. Elizabeth wiped at her face, trying to remove the evidence of her tears and then gathered up the letters. She must find her aunt and uncle at once. They would know what to do.

  * * *

  She found Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner at luncheon, seated comfortably in front of a small fire with cups of cider before them. Mrs. Gardiner saw Elizabeth first and seemed surprised at her niece’s expression.

  “Why, Lizzy! I did not expect to see you for luncheon. I know that we are dining at Pemberley tonight, but you know how your uncle can be when his stomach is empty.” She smiled endearingly at her husband, who patted his broad waist and helped himself to another bite of his sausages. Elizabeth’s smile was strained and she pulled a chair from a nearby table and perched on the edge. She held Jane’s letters tightly in her hands, and a weight settled in her stomach. How was she to break the news? They had been having such a lovely journey…

  “Lizzy, have you had a letter from Longbourn? Is everything quite all right?” Mrs. Gardiner was trying her best to keep things light for Mr. Gardiner’s sake, but she could see that Elizabeth’s eyes were filling with tears that threatened to spill over once more. Elizabeth shook her head and held the letters out towards her aunt. Mrs. Gardiner plucked the crumpled papers from her niece’s shaking hand and unfolded them carefully.

  “I… I do not know how to tell you this, aunt. But it is Lydia.” Elizabeth tried to keep her voice hushed. Their business was not for the others who crowded the inn, but panic edged her words, and she felt that every syllable she uttered echoed in the space.

  “Lydia? Whatever could have happened? She is in Brighton, is she not?” Elizabeth shook her head and wiped at her eyes quickly as her aunt began to scan the letter.

  “I confess I am at a loss as to what to do. I know that I should go back to Longbourn to help Jane and comfort Mama… but I am so angry.” Mrs. Gardiner’s eyes flew wide as she read Jane’s words and her hand covered her mouth to stifle her gasp of shock. Mr. Gardiner set down his fork and held out his hand for the letters, which his wife handed to him without hesitation.

  Mrs. Gardiner took Elizabeth’s hands in hers as Mr. Gardiner read the letters quickly. His brow furrowed with deep thought before he gave the letters back to Elizabeth and wiped his mouth with his napkin.

  “This is the gravest of situations, Lizzy. Make no mistake; I will be assisting your father in seeking Lydia’s immediate marriage to this Mr. Wickham. I must write to Mr. Bennet immediately.” Mr. Gardiner stood and leaned down to kiss his wife on the cheek. “I am sorry, my dear, but we must cut our trip short. You will return to London at once.” Mrs. Gardiner wiped at her own eyes and took a long drink of her cider before handing the cup to Elizabeth, who drained its contents in one gulp.

  “Oh! We must send an urgent message to Pemberley. I suspect we will all be in no mood for polite conversation and gentle company this evening.” Elizabeth’s eyes widened, in the panic over Jane’s letters she had completely forgotten dinner. Whatever would she say to Mr. Darcy? Surely Mr. Gardiner could send the note… say that one of them was taken ill… any excuse but the truth.

  Elizabeth turned the cup in her hands nervously, unable to speak any of the thoughts whirling through her mind. When Mr. Gardiner returned to their table, his face was stern and his brow furrowed.

  “I have sent word to Pemberley that we will not be coming to dinner. I did not say why, only that we had some family matters to attend to. Mr. Darcy will understand, I am sure.” Elizabeth could only nod gratefully, there were no words that could be spoken at this moment to make anything better or soothe the jangled nerves at the table. “I have written to your father, and we will await his advice. I can only imagine how your mother must be faring…” Mrs. Gardiner smiled weakly and her husband reached out to pat her hand gently.

  “Fear not, my dear. We will find Lydia and see her properly married. I swear it.” Mrs. Gardiner’s chin dipped, and Elizabeth saw her aunt’s eyes shining with unshed tears. Selfish, unthinking Lydia. She was the cause of all of this misery, and yet she was blissfully, and willfully, unawares of all the trouble she was causing. Mrs. Bennet was likely locked away in her bedchamber, groaning her misery in the stuffy room to anyone who would listen.

  “We will wait for Mr. Bennet to reply, and then we will decide what to do.” There was nothing more to do. Mrs. Gardiner excused herself to go up to their room and lie down, and Elizabeth was tempted to do the same, but she would write to Jane first and try to offer some comfort. Sleep seemed impossible when worry weighed so heavily on her mind.

  She excused herself from her uncle’s company as well and went back to her own room to write her letters, but once the creamy sheets of paper were set before her, she did not know what to say. The thought of going back to Longbourn to await the assistance of others, or to receive word from Lydia that she was now Mrs. Wickham, was agonizing, and she could not think of a worse fate than having to exist in such a foggy state of uncertainty. If Lydia did not get married to Mr. Wickham, it would be disastrous for them all, that much was clear. The possibility that her youngest sister had already fallen pregnant and would be abandoned by Mr. Wickham also loomed in the back of her mind, but she did not dare give that thought any power. But if it were true… they would never be able to pull themselves out from under the scandal.

  Full of misery and something that seemed more like self-pity with every passing moment, Elizabeth resigned herself to the fact that she would not be able to write a letter that contained any modicum of comfort. Mr. Bennet would give Mr. Gardiner his instruction for how to proceed, and she would either go back to London with her aunt to await word of the wayward pair, or to Longbourn to assist Jane. Either way, she would be helpless in her frustration and worry and there was nothing she could do about it.

  She sat at the rough wooden table staring at the blank paper before her for what seemed like hours. The setting sun and a soft knock at the door of her room was all that roused her from her sorrowful trance.

  “Lizzy, will you come down to supper? Mr. Gardiner has had word from Mr. Darcy, and he has begged our forgiveness for his own sudden absence. He has been called away to London on business and would not have been able to host us for supper.” Mrs. Gardener’s face was pale, and her eyes were red, and Elizabeth wondered if her aunt had gotten any sleep in the last few hours. “Please come down to supper. Mr. Gardiner has ordered us something lovely and warm to comfort our bellies.” Elizabeth smiled, but she was not hungry.

  “I confess that I have no appetite, but I will come down with you. It will do me good to be in your company. Perhaps Mr. Gardiner will have some plans to share with us.” Mrs. Gardiner nodded gently and Elizabeth took her hand and accompanied her down the stairs to where her uncle waited. They ate their supper quietly, and Elizabeth’s mind was far away. Thankfully, her aunt and uncle were also wrapped up in their own thoughts, and no one said a word until the innkeeper’s smiling wife delivered the whiskey pudding to their table.

  “I am expecting a letter from Mr. Bennet in the morning, Lizzy. His reply will
determine what course of action I will take, and I would ask your assistance if he replies the way I believe he will.” Elizabeth stopped shredding her pudding with her fork and looked at her uncle in surprise.

  “Of course, uncle, I will help in whatever way I can.” Mr. Gardiner nodded shortly and looked into his cup of beer.

  “Thank you, Lizzy. I know you will be a great help.” He said nothing more, and Elizabeth was left to wonder what it was that he would be asking her to do, for he gave no other sign as to what he was thinking, and even her aunt looked confused at his words.

  After she had bid her aunt and uncle goodnight, Elizabeth slid under the coverlet and stared at the canopy of her chilly bed. The fire in the hearth was small, but the crackle of the flamed was comforting, and even though she had expected to lie awake for long hours, sleep enveloped her quickly, and she fell into a heavy and dreamless sleep.

  Elizabeth’s Folly

  Chapter 2

  Elizabeth came down to breakfast before her aunt had risen, but Mr. Gardiner was taking tea in the inn’s small breakfast area and Elizabeth joined him hesitantly. She had slept well, but did not feel rested, and there was a heavy lump in her stomach that she did not know how to get rid of.

  “Your father has written, and it is as I suspected.” Mr. Gardiner seemed to be in good spirits, and while Elizabeth to hear what her father had said; she also dreaded the reality of returning to Longbourn. “Mr. Bennet will be making his way to Brighton to speak with Colonel and Mrs. Forster, while I will be leaving at once for Gretna Green.” Her uncle paused and looked up from his newspaper, “and you will be coming with me, Lizzy.” Elizabeth bit her lip against her exhalation of surprise.

  “Really, uncle? You are asking me to come with you? Whyever for?” Mr. Gardiner snapped his newspaper and regarded her kindly.

  “Now, Lizzy. I daresay that there is no one better suited to discovering your sister’s hiding place than you, yourself.” Elizabeth nodded slowly. It was true, they stood a better chance of finding Lydia with her help, and she was grateful to her uncle for suggesting it, as she did not believe that her father would have made such a suggestion.

  “I would, of course, be happy to help. I only hope that we may discover her whereabouts swiftly. But, poor Mama… I should write to Jane and tell her that I will not be able to help her.” Mr. Gardiner held up his hand.

  “There is no need, Lizzy. Mrs. Gardiner will be going to Longbourn in your place. She will tend to my sister and you will have no need to worry for the running of the house. Dear Jane will have help, and your mother will soon recover herself.” All of Elizabeth’s worry was for Jane, but she put a grave expression on her face as her uncle spoke. Mrs. Bennet would no doubt be grateful for the sympathetic ear of her sister-in-law. They took tea in a contemplative silence as Mr. Gardiner resumed reading his paper until Mrs. Gardiner joined them and they were able to take breakfast together in the sunny room. The cheer of the weather did not serve to warm Elizabeth’s worries, however, and she ate very little considering the journey that lay ahead of them.

  * * *

  They parted ways just before luncheon, with Mrs. Gardner begging Elizabeth to find Lydia as soon as possible, if only to ease the suffering of ‘poor Mrs. Bennet.’ Though she did not believe her own words, Elizabeth embraced her aunt tightly and promised to do exactly that. She climbed into the carriage with her uncle. It would not take long to reach Gretna Green, but Elizabeth was anxious for the journey, she had never been to this part of the country, and the stories she had heard gave her pause. In her mind, marriage was a sober undertaking full of ceremony and deep commitment, what Gretna represented was none of these things, and the thought of having to witness her youngest sister pledge herself to someone as reckless and odious as Mr. Wickham made her feel sick at heart.

  Mr. Gardiner had received another letter; this one from Colonel Forster advising him of the name of a contact that Mr. Wickham may have turned to in Scotland, and Mr. Gardiner was intent on seeking the man out. Elizabeth would have to plan her own strategy, for she was unsure of how to proceed in her search. Though she did not say it, she did not know how much trust could be placed in Colonel Forster, for it was under his watch that Lydia had been allowed to steal away.

  Mr. Gardiner directed the carriage towards an inn on the edge of town, specifically chosen so that they would be able to see the comings and goings of the main road that led to London. The town of Gretna Green was lovely and quaint, as Elizabeth supposed most Scottish towns would be, and the streets bustled with activity. The inn was old, but well maintained, and her room was comfortably appointed and would suit her needs well. Paper for writing letters was available to her, and a washing basin and privacy screen stood near one wall. Jane would have been comfortable here, and Elizabeth suddenly wished for her sister’s company. Jane’s calming presence would have been welcome in this situation. Elizabeth could be counted on to jump when it was required, but Jane’s quiet patience often yielded better results than Elizabeth’s emotional responses. She heaved a sigh and looked out of her window down at the main street.

  Regimental red jackets were everywhere, and Elizabeth scanned the crowds for a familiar set of dark curls, or Mr. Wickham’s lean frame. She scolded herself for assuming that Mr. Wickham would be foolish enough to wear his regimentals out in public. Especially if he and Lydia were on the run. Turning from the window, Elizabeth left her room, and found her uncle speaking to the innkeeper. If the contact Colonel Forster had provided did not yield any results, Mr. Gardiner had a plan for searching the town, but Elizabeth was not sure that it was the best course of action. Enquiring at the various inns and rooming houses in town might chase them loose, but Elizabeth had a feeling that while Mr. Gardiner was looking for Mr. Wickham, that more would be accomplished if they sought Lydia instead.

  Lydia was a foolish girl with a loud voice and very little tact. She and Mr. Wickham might be on the run, but Elizabeth doubted that Mr. Wickham had revealed the truth of the matter to Lydia, which meant that her younger sister would be flaunting her newfound freedom all over town.

  “There now, Lizzy. Mr. Waterman has given me an address to call upon Mr. McGregor, Colonel Forster is sure that Mr. Wickham would have called upon him when he and Lydia arrived in town.” Elizabeth nodded and tied the strings of her bonnet tightly before pulling on her gloves.

  “If you are certain that this is where we must begin our search, uncle, then I will gladly accompany you to see this man. I do hope that he has heard something of Mr. Wickham and Lydia. I should like to send Mama and Jane a comforting letter instead of a disappointing one.” Mr. Gardiner smiled reassuringly, but Elizabeth’s spirits were not lifted.

  She followed her uncle out of the inn and into the crowded street, the day was fine and Elizabeth tried to focus on looking for Lydia. She listened intently for her younger sister’s distinctive laugh, but the noise and bustle of the street drowned out any chance of noticing any specific sound. She searched the faces of the young women who were out shopping or on the arms of their husbands, but she did not see Lydia among them. She looked down a narrow street, and froze in her place.

  “Uncle! Wait!” Mr. Gardiner looked over in surprise as Elizabeth rushed down the cobblestone street towards a young woman walking with a tall, slender man. The young woman’s laughter echoed in Elizabeth’s ears, and spurred her forward. Her heart was in her throat as she reached out for the young woman’s shoulder, intent on gripping it tightly, spinning her around and pulling her away from Mr. Wickham for the scolding of her life.

  The young woman turned towards the young man beside her and Elizabeth snatched her hand away. It was not Lydia at all... her hair was similar, her laugh almost an exact replica of Lydia’s... but it was not her, and the young man at her side was not Mr. Wickham. Elizabeth met the young woman’s eyes for just a moment before she turned away, her cheeks burning with embarrassment and her eyes stinging with tears. Mr. Gardiner waited for her on the main street and Elizabeth wal
ked towards him at a slower pace, wiping at her face quickly to disguise her distress.

  “Are you quite all right, Lizzy?” His question was full of concern, and Elizabeth smiled tremulously in response.

  “Yes... yes, of course. I thought that I saw Lydia, but I was mistaken. No matter, uncle. Let us continue to Mr. McGregor’s, I am sure he will be able to answer our questions.” Mr. Gardiner looked down the side street, but the couple had disappeared. They resumed their walk, but Elizabeth did not stop searching the faces of the people they passed for Mr. Wickham or Lydia. What she did not expect was to see a familiar face that had no right to be anywhere near Gretna Green.

  “Mr. Darcy! How wonderful to see you again, so soon!” Mr. Gardiner was all smiles as he shook Mr. Darcy’s hand, but Elizabeth was surprised to see him there.

  “Mr. Darcy, it is indeed a surprise to see you. We were under the impression that you were called away from Pemberley on business.” Mr. Gardiner coughed uncomfortably, but Mr. Darcy did not flinch.

  “Indeed, Miss Bennet. I am here on business. I must say that I am surprised to see you here; Mr. Gardiner informed me that you would be returning to Hertfordshire. A family emergency, if I am not mistaken?” Elizabeth felt a hot blush stain her cheeks, and she did not know how to respond. Thankfully, Mr. Gardiner came to her rescue.

  “Mr. Darcy, will you do us the honor of taking supper with us? We are staying at the White Hart, and your company would be most welcome.” Elizabeth’s eyes widened in surprise. To have Mr. Darcy join them for dinner could be disastrous for them. What if he discovered the reason why they were in Gretna Green? Mr. Darcy’s poor opinion would be sure to reach the ears of Mr. Bingley and his sisters, and then... their complete ruin would be inevitable.